Jon Jones, Strapped.

So, this past weekend, a man tried to rob Jon Jones. Yes, you heard that right. Some fucking dick tried to rob the Greatest Mixed Martial Artist of all time… on Halloween Night. For those who are wondering, it is still unknown what mental illness this poor man is dealing with.

Even though Jones’ hands qualify for a lethal weapon themselves, we also learned Jonny keeps that fucking thang on him. The video shows a man entering Jones’ driveway and opening the doors to multiple cars. Clearly the man was snooping around for something of value. But, contrary to what many people think, the man breaking into cars was not what caught the GOAT’s attention.

It appears that upon finding nothing but a pound of cocaine in both cars, the man yelled, “THIS IS EXACTLY WHY KHABIB IS #1!”

Being that Jones has essentially argued with himself on social media for the past week that he is the greatest fighter of all time, one could guess, this is where Jones stepped onto the scene. The video footage shows Jones walking outside with a 12 gauge shotgun locked and loaded. As anyone would, the man robbing Jones headed for the fucking hills! Though, Jon caught up to him and acknowledged him by politely tapping his shotgun on the mans driver side window.

Honestly I thought it would be common sense to not rob a UFC Fighter, but 2020 continues to show me I don’t know shit. But, to the man out there who tried to pull this stunt, if you’re going to try robbing a UFC Fighter again, you’ll probably have more success at CM Punk’s residence.